Look at this table. Not bad, right? I painted it all shiny black like a seal. Or Seal. But I looked at that table and was like, “you’re boring!” After storming out of the house after the volatile argument with my table, I came back home, settled down and made plans with the table to spice things up.
First off, I took the table to an underground sex club in Manhattan. We explored new parts to our personalities and our relationship. It was scary, slightly dangerous, but ultimately fulfilling.
After we showered, I prepped the table for decoupage.
Below is the metamorphosis that took for frigging ever. The table is now covered in pictures from vintage Playboy magazines from the early 60’s, Rolling Stones from the early 80’s, SI, old comic books, 60’s school textbooks and Popular Mechanics. It was a massive endeavor.Here’s how it looked at completion after several coats of nausea-inducing polyurethane.