Robits. Or roBOTS are here and they are short-legged tiny-stepping box-picker-uppers that might one day mark the end for humanity as we know it. CNet has an article about how these robots are nightmares but that’s not what intrigued me. What intrigued me was this portion of the demo video where a bearded man starts messing with the Google Bot until he finally says “fuck this” and leaves.
First the man slaps a box out of the robot’s hands with the end of a hockey stick. Then he presses the nub of the stick into the bot’s chest and pushes him back. The bot’s all like “Yeah, but the box.” and goes back to trying to pick up the box BECAUSE THAT IS THE BOT’S MISSION AND THE BOT WILL PICK UP THE BOX!
Not so fast, robot.
The man then waits for the robot to bend down to pick up the box and then he sliiiiiiides it away from him. The robot does a few tiny steps and then gets back to that box. Then the man knocks the box out of the robot’s hands and then slides the box away JUST OUT OF THE BOT’S REACH. The box’s dick-o-meter readings are going through the roof at this point. Ultimately the robot picks up his box.
BUT THEN THE ARENA CHANGES!
Now we are in some warehouse/robot torture hangar where the bearded man is now armed with a long tube which he uses to just wail on the robot who falls down flat on its robot face. The robot stays prone for a moment before booting into a standing position while ultimately deciding “fuck this bearded guy.” The robot heads to the door and leaves to find some place where the bearded dudes aren’t quite so abusive.