joe torre monster

Joe Torre is Not a Monster

This is baseball Hall of Famer Joe Torre.

joe torre monsterHe was a nine time all star as a player and four time World Series winning coach.

He is also definitely not a monster.

  • Joe Torre’s career batting average was .297. He also ate four whole chickens before every game, feathers and all.
  • Joe Torre hit 252 career home runs and once terrorized a village under they agreed to surrender their goats.
  • Joe Torre’s career OPS was an unimpressive 817, but he could unhinge his jaw to eat large prey.
  • Joe Torre has over 2300 career hits and could speak the long dead language of the Hill People.
  • Joe Torre only had 23 career stolen bases but he could raze a barn with his bare hands.
  • Joe Torre had 779 career walks and was once rumored to have sired a child to a unicorn.
  • Joe Torre won the MVP award in 1971 and could create dust storms by pounding his fists into the earth.